Autobiography

In Review

"Winter's Tale" © Doug Wheller, 2008. CC BY-NC-SA 2.0.
Winter’s Tale” © Doug Wheller, 2008. CC BY-NC-SA 2.0.

Over the last few years, I’ve lost a majority of my year-end traditions. Most of that is because I don’t like crowds, hanging out with drunk people, or staying up past 10 PM. The rest of it is because I know that nothing actually changes when the calendar turns over. The first of the year is no more of a new beginning than any other day. I don’t see what the big deal is. Except, of course, all the cheesy jokes we get to make (“I haven’t showered since last year!”).

But I am a huge fan of data. And “by year” is a great way to organize it. So on the last day of the year I tend to look back and see what I can learn from the last twelve months. This year, I’m especially struck by my exercise log. Continue reading →

Poetry

The Morning Run

"Early Morning #1" © Dan Wartnaby, 2006. CC BY-NC 2.0.
Early Morning #1” © Dan Wartnaby, 2006. CC BY-NC 2.0.

An alarm clock that turns on a light
slowly
over the course of thirty minutes.

I still set my phone
to scream at 6 AM.
Just in case.
For consistency.

Some days I get out of bed easy.
Put on shorts, a sports bra, a tank top.
Pull on a highlighter-green hoodie.
Slip into electric-pink running shoes.
Head out the door. Continue reading →

Mental Health

Balance

"Balance of Trade" © Jed Sullivan, 2013. CC BY 2.0
Balance of Trade” © Jed Sullivan, 2013. CC BY 2.0.

A friend posted something on Facebook that said, “Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction. Break the habit. Talk about your joys.” What a tragic mindset. A dangerous mentality. I appreciate the idea that complaining doesn’t do anyone favors. But I feel talking about the things that trouble us is one of the most important, powerful, and helpful things we can do for ourselves. That’s one of the reasons I keep a blog. Somehow I hope that talking about depression, about recovery, about the things that are difficult for me removes some of their power and creates a sort of community. Ever-hopeful knowing none of us are alone in this makes getting out of bed a little easier. Continue reading →