Poetry

NOLA

"Cypress Mystery" © Peter Barker, 2011. CC BY-NC-ND 2.0.
Cypress Mystery” © Peter Barker, 2011. CC BY-NC-ND 2.0.
Lars rolled down the window of his truck
Proffered me a cigarette
I sighed heavy, shook my head
Took it
Coughed hard
It’d been three months

“Pull up over here, man.
If I’m smoking on this trip
I need a pack of Newports.”

“When did you start smoking
menthols?”
Lips peeled back in disgust Continue reading →

Autobiography

Grateful

"Wish Waiting to Happen" © Kent Landerholm, 2012. CC BY-NC 2.0.
Wish Waiting to Happen” © Kent Landerholm, 2012. CC BY-NC 2.0.
Twenty-seven days into November.
Twenty-seven things I’m thankful for this year.

Mason. My partner, my counterpart, my constant inspiration.
My family. By biology, by marriage, by careful handpicking.
Cheese. Pretty much any kind of cheese.
Shelter. Never wondering how I’m going to stay warm or where I’m going to sleep.
Sobriety. Every single day I have under my belt and all the ones ahead of me. Continue reading →

Autobiography

Compassion

forestforthetrees
Forest for The Trees” © Emily Horne and Joey Comeau, 2014. a softer world.

Florence Scovel Shinn said, “When you send out real love, real love will return to you.” I think that’s the only way you receive it. You get out what you put in. You see the things you’re looking for. It’s easy to forget. Fall victim to the idea everything is cruel. Fail to realize there are kind things, too. You just stopped seeing them. It becomes ingrained. Accidental habits. Maybe that’s just one of the those things depression does to you. Rolls the fog in. Puts the blinders on. When you’re hurting it’s hard to see the goodness in the world.

It’s hard to see it happen, though. I understand. Bit by bit the softness goes away. Sitting in a room, having a conversation. You don’t notice the sun going down until you can’t see the person in front of you. As if the night landed all at once. When did this happen? When did I become so hopeless? So negative. So angry. Continue reading →