Category: Gratitude

6/365
Gratitude

6/365

Ruby PipesLeave a comment

I met with my new medical doctor today. She’d actually read my chart and knew I’m bipolar and have been hospitalized for suicidal ideation. I’ve never had a new doctor come in prepared like that. It felt good to not have to bring it up myself, especially since I’m so prone not to.

On my way to pick up lunch today I saw this man in his car rocking out. Like, really just getting down with his car dancing. It made me so happy to see someone having so much fun in such a regularly dull part of the day.

This afternoon I had a customer come in and first thing she came up to thank me for the help I gave her the day before. She said it was just the boost of confidence she needed to get her jewelry legs back under her. I was so glad that I helped her and so touched that she took the time to thank me again.

5/365
Gratitude

5/365

Ruby Pipes4 Comments

I am so glad that I found the perfect graph paper notebooks in bulk on Amazon sometime a couple years ago. Spiral bound with perforated edges. That off-white color that makes you feel like a real mathematician. The perfect cardboard backing for taking notes while sitting sideways and writing on your knee. They are fabulous and I buy them by the case.

In math today I asked my professor to go over a question. I found myself tremendously pleased that I am at the point in my life where I will actually ask for help in front of other people when I need it. I always want to just know things and not need assistance. And if I do need help I don’t want to ask for it in front of a group full of people I assume are smarter than me. But I did it today and that is awesome.

Big shout-out to Justin from my pre-calculus class who, after I asked that question, leaned back in his chair, smiled, and said, “Thanks for asking that. I was lost, too.” He didn’t have to say anything. Didn’t have to make me feel any less alone. But he took that little moment to say, “Hey, me, too.” People should do that more. I should do that more. Today, he did.

4/365
Gratitude

4/365

Ruby Pipes6 Comments

Today I am thankful for smoke breaks. Those quiet moments in between class and tasks at work. Where I take some time to just sit and be with myself. Where I finally let myself do nothing and just enjoy my company.

I am so fortunate to have found a therapist so perfectly suited for this point in my life. Today she asked me if I think I am deserving of self-compassion. When I couldn’t answer she asked me what I thought self-compassion meant. I took a deep breath, looked her right in the eyes, and said, “I guess it means always assuming I’m doing the best I can.” No one has ever asked me that question before. No one has ever asked me if I deserve it. I’m looking forward to learning how to believe I am.

We’re doing inventory at work right now. For those of you who don’t know, I work in a bead shop. This means we have hundreds of thousands of different beads and we are counting every single one of them. Every ear wire, ever bead cap, every card of silk. Everything. I am so happy that I work with people who are making this time amusing and enjoyable instead of the incredible stress heap it could be. I’m also insanely grateful for the scales we bought this year so we can count by weight instead of by hand.