Addiction

Reflecting on my first year sober

"The Bottom of the Bottle" © Nathan Stang, 2011. CC BY-NC-ND 2.0.
The Bottom of the Bottle” © Nathan Stang, 2011. CC BY-NC-ND 2.0.
As of today, I’ve been sober for exactly one year. My previous personal record was about three months, I think. And even then I can’t remember if it was complete sobriety or if I was on a “it’s okay if I only have one or two drinks a night” stint.

I started drinking when I was thirteen years old. That’s crazy to think about, isn’t it? I’m twenty-six now. So I spent half my life getting hammered. It came in waves, of course. Some times I drank more and at others I drank less. Getting sloshed every day or a couple times a month. But, for my entire adult life, I tied drinking tight to my identity. Continue reading →

Personal Development

True Grit

 "winter frost" © Gail Fisher, 2010. CC BY 2.0.
winter frost” © Gail Fisher, 2010. CC BY 2.0.

For four days I did the same thing over and over out of necessity. I slept in and then stayed curled up in bed. On occasion I would transfer to the couch and fall asleep again. I’m always astounded by how quick I become used to being sick. It becomes my normal, my routine. I get entrenched in the monotony and forget it hasn’t always been like this.

I start to wonder if I’m still sick or if I’ve just gotten used to doing next to nothing. It takes less than a week to adapt to feeling powerless, but every ounce of self-discipline you can muster to get your power back again. Continue reading →